Well the first month of this year was prob one of the worst months of my life. Tragic, depressing, heart-wrenching all those words come to mind when I think of it. I mean every damn day was pure shit. I saw Ethan again and I said to myself, ok Jesus, now im sure you hate me. It's a new year (Chinese new year) and things are looking up. I thank my higher power for guiding me and placing people in my life especially my girl Lara. But I always believe life goes on. And I'm a living testament.
So guess who's doing another year in china? Shit I'm just as surprised as you are. I was getting ready to come home In February but now I signed another contract with my school. Plus, my business is starting to grow so I would be a fool to leave and go back to America with no job. The idea of working a real job scares me. Like candy man scary (sidenote you couldn't pay me to say his name 3x in the mirror)
I will return to America for the month of may and June because my best friend is getting married and I'm giving her the best bridal shower and bachelette party ever. Then I'll return to china to finish out my contract. I'm prob going to live here for a while but anything permanent scares me as well so I'm here until further notice. So when people ask me where's my home after 3 years I guess it's okay to say china is my home. That's so crazy to me, being the fact that I'm a black girl from Chicago. Sometimes I just walk here and cry and thank God I'm here. I could still be back in America hating my life and dating a man who cheated on me and got someone pregnant. So when you have faith anything is possible. But let me stop preaching cause I hate people who do that. ( I'll discuss my current religion in another post)
Currently I don't want to get married or even thinking about settling down. Me and chocolate drop are done. And I have done a 180. I'm sure I will get married but at the moment I'm good. According to my reading my aunt gave me(creole powers) this is the year for love. (vomits) but whatever. I just wanna travel and make money. I do have the finest Chinese man in china claiming me tho. He's fine and rich. But whatever. Its early. I may wake up tomorrow and be over it. We haven't had sex yet but it's the beginning and everything is wonderful in the beginning. Damn, I'm bitter.
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Location:Jinan Shandong
