I saw satan today!!

I saw my ex, Ethan..Ha! I sure did! Most people know if you're been reading my blog from the beginning. The one Chinese boy that I really did love and that breakup was horrible horrible horrible! We had social media wars with our status. He said f me and I responded with I'm not a man! Find you a boyfriend since you wanna act like a bitch! I'm not ashamed that that 5'8 little chinese thug had me all the way open. I was in the hoodest club still video chatting him. Got here and he flipped the script. While he was on his period he saw me out with another guy and every since then he's become Satan. I always wondered what would happen if I saw him? Would I slap him? Would I toss my hair? Or push him down some stairs. Would I speak and pretend everything is okay. Or do I say you wanna go! Go! But the name stays here. Change that shit! (You don't know how many times I watch that what's love got to do with it) (read earlier blogs you would understand)
So I'm leaving the gym and I see a man laying down lifting weights. I said to myself damn he looks like Ethan but way fatter! Then he saw me and froze! Then I said to myself "damn that's Ethan he's fat as hell" and walked away. Mediation works. But I haven't seen him in a year. I'm over it! I was heartbroken but I don't have time to worry about that. I'm in a nice heathy relationship which is foreign to me. So Im focused on that and staying skinny. But ladies, ladies he's gained the 25 pounds I lost! So 2 points for us!! Someone have a drink for me!
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Location:Gym in Jinan

I'm over this Shit!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

So of course you have bad days! The other day was one. I'm so tired of all this shit and I can't wait to fucking leave. I just need a damn break!!!! I don't know if it's the one meal of day, no carbs but everyone and everything is pisting me off.

For one I live in a nice city with nice people but common sense just isn't something common. My patience has completely dissolved. After running and doing 100 jumping jacks, hella squats etc I come home to no fucking power. Now this morning when I walked downstairs from the 24 floor because the 2 working elevators out of the 3 also wasn't working I didn't complain. Why the hell ALL 3 elevators weren't working when we have 33 floors I will never know. Anyway, I have no power. I go to the power circuit no luck. Go down stairs to the self elected watch man and ask him he immediately says he doesn't understand. So now you can't read or hear my iPhone translate the problem??? Aww okay. This is why they say education is important so you're not outside at 70 years guarding a place in a city where it's .5% violence.

At this point, I'm fuming. I ask someone else and they basically said I didn't pay the bill which I paid over the amount and a deposit. My Chinese friend called the company they didnt even know my power was off!

So I see my neighbor, a male. I've never met but I heard him have sex before. It must been a prostitute cause his house has no furniture. A real Chinese girl doesn't even date you unless you have a house and car. But whatever.... I tell him him I have no power and he's looking like and??!! He's at the door trying to get in his apartment. I tell him to talk to my friend and he says he's doesn't speak English. Hey Guess what?!! I'm not an idiot so why would I give the phone to someone who speaks English when you speak chinese? Better yet couldn't I just talk to you myself? This is what I mean when I say common sense isn't common. Once he realizes his power is off then it becomes a different story. Freaking moron.......

Turns out there was a "fire" when means someone prob burn there pot of noodles and cause a little smoke and they turned the power off in the building. Except for the elevators!!!!!!

I'm just over it.. I love China. I really do but I just need a break like a long one. Everything is irritating me so I know it's me with the problem. I'm tired of people staring at me when there the ones holding a baby with his ass cheeks out. I'm tired of trying on clothes and there not fitting no matter how much weight I lost. I'm tired of people asking me why I'm not married. I'm tired of people offering me advice on stupid shit like I shouldn't take a bath because its too cold. Hey, I rather be sick than dirty. Or what I should or should not eat to loose weight meanwhile no one has a toned tummy and they're eating bread with every meal. Yet, oranges I'm eating is what causing my legs to be bigger. And I really wanna say maybe if you eat some oranges and do some squats with me then you're husband would give you some more than just twice a month!

Now I say all this like I'm not going to be crying when it's time to leave. If I stay anyway for a long period of time I go crazy. I need to go to my happy place: the beach. So I'm going to have an extended stay in Dominican Republic. There I will figure out the next move for myself because I know God didnt send me to China just to teach. I do know I have a special calling for children but that's not what I want to do with my life. I know what I want to do but I'm quiet on it until I figure out a plan for myself.







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Japan

My chocolate drop, sexiest man on the beach!!!!





Japan is beautiful!!!

Location:Okinawa

Holy shit a toilet!! 🙌🙌🙌🙌🙌🙌🙌🙌

So I went to go see my chocolate drop and had a beautiful time. We went to Okinawa because he knows the beach is my happy place.. Japan is soo different from china. Here's my top 5 differences between china and Japan.

5. The girls don't wear stuff animals nor do they look like they live in little house on the prairie. I also saw a man with a tupac shirt on. *almost passed out" most chinese men only know flo rida.

4. They don't spit and I saw no babies peeing in the street!! I can breathe the air too!!

3. There's English signs! *almost caught the holy ghost* I was like omg I can read!!!!!!!'

2. No one stared at me like blacks were a myth and I was the first and only one.

1. They have the best toilets ever. Not saying that just because they're aren't any toilets where I come from. Even the public restrooms have toilets that play music etc.








Japenese toilet and it heats too!!






Chinese toilet

Most people don't know that the Chinese hate the Japanese.. Don't ever get them confused!!

Location:Japan

God didn't send me to voicemail!! Yay!

Update on the love life.... Anyone knows I have the craziest stories when it comes to dating and relationships. Like seriously I could write a book. I think dating in china is a little difficult because I don't want to marry a Chinese guy. I know I'm not going to live in china forever and most of them want to live in THEIR country. Which I totally understand. Also I don't think they would ever understand what i would give up to be with them. I like china but its not my home. I'm constantly reminded because i cant read a street sign or anything. no one looks like me. I can't find makeup etc. I was dating a guy I called Mr. Big. He's Chinese. I liked Mr. Big. a lot but he has the entire country throwing themselves at him I knew that I would only be an option. An option he likes to show off for important events. See Mr. big reminds me of that drake song" we might look like we're in love but only on camera, only on camera. And maybe if I was 23 I wouldn't care. At 28, I want more. But I wasn't giving my 100 percent either. The games become exhausting. He's the guy doesn't want to be your boyfriend but will have a stroke if someone talks to you. I want that grade school romance. Do you like me yes or no? Simple. I like you, you like me. Lets play together.

I met a few other people but when you know what you want you're not going to waste time. Like you send a message and they don't respond. Fine erase. I'm tired of playing games or proving to someone how great you are. I gave up.

One day I got a message from my homegirl and she had a friend for me and he lived in Japan. I said ok hell can't get any worse. Well lets just say he's amazing. I'm completely smitten, in like, sprung etc.... I'm like well God was listening to me, I thought he was forwarding me to voicemail. That's my chocolate drop. Yes, he's black! Everyone was in an uproar when I said I don't really date black men. I guess everyone forgot I live in CHINA!!! I saw a black guy in the club and he did a split.. Yes he did a split. I love David Guetta too but damn. Another black guy told me he wanted to braid my hair. So yeah... But my chocolate drop is very special to me so I won't be opening up too much about him. Def turned in my playa card... But leads me to my next post: Japan

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Never think that I'm not from Chicago for one second

So after 2 years of being in China, Chicago has finally came out. It's so funny because if you ask anyone here describe Lauren they would say" always happy and sweet girl" people ask me you get angry? I say yes of course but no one ever does anything crazy so I'm not crazy, if you ask someone in America they would say Lauren's mouth is insane, she's always going off, etc. I really think its has to do with your environment. Living here is really like a break from reality. Life is completely opposite, no fights no murders, and no violence. Everyone is happy. Therefore I'm happy. Then you always got the one nigga that tries you. ( I'm working on not using that word but if describes this man I got into with) About month ago, soutside Chicago came for a quick visit. Lol

So all my friends are like 24 so for a week we all partied and kicked it and I pretended I was 24 too. Not a good idea!!!! In the club: our server was a cutie. After 3 hours of drinking I dismissed the fact that he was a waiter and bagged him. Before you start to judge all I'm saying is that a girl who is 28 who wants to get married and have children shouldn't be wasting time with a waiter who's 24. Plus I make way more money than him and I believe the man should be the breadwinner. Atleast for me and after this situation I'm more convinced.

Anyway the waiter was fine so I bagged him. We talked for a few days and he seemed really cool. I try to be understanding cause I knew he didn't have any money. Again every time I'm understanding it never goes right. Anyway he wanted to teach me how to cook different Chinese dishes. Ok cool. He came to my house and tells me how nice it is, how much is the rent blah blah blah. I think it's average but he acted like I live in a palace. Great dinner we watched some black movies and had a good time. I say aww he's cool.
The next day he had some sob story and said his job was late with his check and he was homeless. American Lauren would have been like ＂and that affects me how?" but china Lauren forgets that some people just ain't shit. So I said I have an extra bedroom you can have it for 1 or 2 nights. Next day is his birthday and we kicked. This nigga brings a plastic bag with all his belongings. In my head I said "hell no" I didn't know should I be confused because all his stuff fits in a plastic bag or did he think he was going to be my roomate. Anyway I took him to dinner for his birthday. During dinner he says some shit like I have no money. Again in my head " I know this nigga ain't thinking I'm a trick? I'm sorry are we fucking?" so I brush it off. Then he says can I loan him some money?" yes. He did! I said I don't give money to men, they give me money. Then towards the end of dinner we leave and he said he wants some cigaretts. Now, I'm over him completely cause I'm just appalled and offended. He asked me for money and he also implied that he wanted to stay with me for good and me be his girlfriend. I said I'll buy you some cigaretts and then I'm going home to sleep. You can stay one night tomorrow you leaving. Get to the counter then broke turd is picking everything up and taking it the the counter and then looked at me. And that when he got cussed out. At the register.. And I left and proceeded to walk home. Now I'm an Aries and my temper is not something I'm proud of. So I'm just quiet. Which is worse because usually I snapped then in 5 minutes I'm not angry. But I didn't want to act crazy so I'm quiet. He's walking with me laughing. Like its a joke. See clearly he only knows happy Lauren in China. He's doesn't know I'm Creole and I'm from the soutside of Chicago. So he's just laughing like I'm telling jokes. Fuel to my fire. Anyway I try to keep my calm and we get to my house. I'm taking deep breaths and counting to 10. We're in my house and I say in chinese. I'm angry and don't want to talk to you. Then he proceeds to touch me and laugh. I said dont touch me. Again I say in chinese, I'm not chinese when I say don't touch me don't touch me. He's laughs and then tries to touch me again.


Now I don't condone violence, my daddy says never hit a man unless you can take a punch. Words i live by.. With that being said i punched him dead in his stomach and knocked his wind out. The guy is like 5'6 and smaller than me. I don't tolerate disrespect not in my house. I also will not allow anyone to take my niceness for weakness. He's on the couch grabbing his stomach. And then all the Chicago language I though I forgot reappeared, things like" on my momma I'm not the one, you think everything is sweet it's not. Try me if you want to. I also provided the best Chinese translation I could possibly give. Then he says something like his friend had an American girl and she would give him money and just like any black girl would say" well go and ask that chick" in fact take your plastic bag of crap with you. This isn't a homeless shelter. Even at dinner he spent the whole time on his phone like I wasn't there. Then he asked me for money 3 times for 3 different lies. Usually I'm calmer but from the end of September to the beginning of November I'm not so nice. It's my grandmothers bday and the day she died in that time period. I don't take it well so I'm already a firecracker in that period. Even my chinese friends said he did what? Are you sure he's chinese?? Im even shocked. That really doesn't happen here. Infact the guys are very old fashioned and pay for everything. Only I would be so lucky to find the only nigga in china.





Ladies if you see him or anyone that looks like him RUN!

Sorry for the absence....

So it's been a long time. Sorry. It's hard for me to be committed to things even if it's a blog. Lol. Been swamped with work and not teaching but my own business. Next year I just plan to travel so i need a way to make money while Im on my vacation. lol I also moved into a way better spot. If anyone has followed my blog from the very beginning then you remember my first house. It was on the 6th floor with no elevator. One bedroom with a very Chinese bathroom and a kitchen. Now I live in Wanda plaza. One of the best areas in my city and I live in a highrise on the 24th floor in the middle of the shopping area including a Zara, my favorite store just because I don't feel like a fat ass when I try on the clothes... My apartment is small but I love it. 2 bedrooms although I used the other one for a closet. Lol. I met a girl named Lara who lives next door and we quickly became best friends. She is the chinese version of my sunshine Ivory. We are really 2 peas in a pod and I feel like I've known her all my life. She's my road dog.... Then I have my 2 brothers...... And I don't use that term lightly... My crew just like in the states is small and tight... I have countless memories that will last a lifetime...





Lara..... I'm trying to hook her up with a foreign guy!! Anyone interested?


My brother Abbaddi


My brother mike


How we get down on weekends.... Can you tell I'm loving my life?

Birthday and catch up!!!

I've been MIA and my apologies.. I have 5000 hustles and between my store Fashion Cloudz and my import/ export company I have no time. I've decided that I'm not going to teach next year. Nor, do I really want to work for someone therefore I'm busting my ass now so I can relax more next year. Getting my companies up and running have been extremely stressful but everything now is slowly starting to come together.

My birthday was amazing. Partying with friends and I had a great time! Mr send it does what he does best. Send something. After my birthday we went out separate ways. Well I did. Rich men have a problem with understanding you don't want them. He still has his friends call me trying to reason with me. You can have your momma call, I will still say tell your son go play in traffic. If you want to send something send all my friends to china. Then I will understand. In the words of my grandpa, " I don't take a backseat to anything"

Pics of my birthday







Also went back to Beijing for the David Guetta festival on the Great Wall. I'm starting to slowly like Beijing again.... Lol.

I'se Married Now *in my color purple voice*

Okay so I'm not really married but unfortunately I've come down with the fever: yellow fever. Dammit I swore I was going to get vaccinated after Ethan but I forgot. I swore all the Chinese men off just like bitter women do after a breakup. It's been 3 months so I guess it's time to move on.

My girl who is a housewife ( what I will be) introduced me to her husband's friend. They were waiting outside and he took my hand kissed it and walked me to their section. We are talking and laughing having a good time. Then he whispers I like you. An hour later I meet some of his friends and he introduces me as his wife. Unfortunately my face said what the fuck? I quickly changed it and smiled and said a few Chinese words. I shrugged it off cause I figured he was drunk. Afterwards we take a walk in the park and he takes me home and doesn't try me!!!!!!!
So he's been calling me his wife ever since. I doubled check to make sure he knows my name and the translation for wife. Again with Chinese men there's no bullshitting. If they like you 4real, there all the way in. He's extremely sweet and very old fashioned. He gives me roses, sweet messages etc. the stuff that makes you feel all girly and shit. (Trying to be less thug and more girly bare with me.) All his friends love me.I was raised by strong black women so I know how to serve a man. He always makes sure I'm straight so I have no problem serving him. When I was putting food on his plate and pouring his drinks his friends told me I was a perfect wife. I was thinking well actually I'm not a wife at all but okay. They all know me as dan's wife" ( he has a Extra Chinese name so we will call him Dan)

Our relationship is quite different from me and Ethan. Yes I'm comparing, don't judge me. Ethan def wasn't romantic, no flowers etc. The first time we met we both peed in bushes together. Ethan and I did have a lot of free personal time together. Dan has an assistant and a driver so it's always a group. Dan is mr. I'll send somebody. When I go to the bathroom someone escorts me. He always send someone or something to take his place or a gift so I can't complain. It's hard cause he's ALWAYS working and I work 6 days out the week so when he's traveling I can't see him. I can see why housewives start fucking the pool boy now. Lol. I've been a good wife, after work I come home. No parties etc. Trying to improve my cooking skills and work on my businesses.
Dan is great and I take it day by day. The hardest thing is to try to give your heart to someone after countless disappointments. So I tell myself love like I never been hurt. Even when I want to jap, I ask myself if my ex didn't do that would I even think that? Hell I'm 28 I gotta let go of my fear and settle down.

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Location:I'se marry now *color purple voice*

Everyone loves a Brown Girl

Usually the most asked question I get is how do the men treat you? How is it over there? Are they racist? Etc. With this post I will 100 percent honest (as if I'm never am) and just try to address all racial questions that is usually asked.
Before I moved to China, I was extremely worried that people would hate me because I'm Black. Just like everyone else my only experience with the Asian culture was being followed around the store by one. I was also very ignorant to the fact that its completely different races: Chinese, Japanese, Korean,Vietnamese, Thai, etc. Were almost brainwashed to think as if they are all the same. I would say in America you are reminded of your color far more than most places.
I'm sure everyone may not be treated the same but I can only give account on what I've experienced. Overall being black in China has been a 95 percent positive experience. For my first year here, I kept thinking to myself why are these people so nice to me? Maybe they don't know I'm Black! I live in Jinan, Shandong and that place is known to be a city with the nicest people in China. Some people here say " No, you're not black, you're brown." Other people say you just a foreigner. I can honestly say I haven't experienced racism here.
Now when it comes to relationships I heard people say " Chinese men don't like black women." I also heard that they just want to fuck you." So I'm just going to keep it real. Sure some man just want to hit it. That's just some men are about regardless of race. I also would say I've met 2 different men parents who wanted to MARRY me. So clearly I killed that stereotype and if it was up to someone else I would be married at this moment.


Now of course I've been approached on Chinese social sites by strangers asking me How much do you charge for sex? I usually respond "the same price your mother charges. " Then that conversation is over. I've had guys who tried to get me drunk (which is impossible) and think the panties will slide down so again certain things happen everywhere. For the most part, I feel like they adore me. When you're out with them, it's all about you. They order everything on the menu for you. They always keep your glass full, open doors etc. In the club, they don't even talk to you without buying a drink. I've had guys buy bottles for me and my friends said were were beautiful and walked away. One thing about me I'm fun to be around. Life is short and if I die in the next 5 mins I'm be leaving this world having fun. Chinese men love girls who just want to have fun.
Most of you know I was also in a serious relationship with a Chinese man named Ethan. Never and I mean never did I think I would fall for a Chinese guy. We were in a Real relationship. Holding hands, kissing in public type relationship. He bought my family gifts. Sometimes when you click with someone it has no color. I never dated outside my race until I came here. I also never loved a guy the way I love Ethan and I'm having the hardest time getting over it and that's all the way real.


I also took the liberty to ask a few males about what they thought about foreign women. One friend said it was his dream to have a foreign girlfriend because they are so "free and fun" He said he wouldn't marry her because she wouldn't want to live in china forever. (Atleast he's honest with himself)
Friend number two said he wants a foreign girlfriend then proceeded to put his hand in my thigh. I told him nigga please because he may be Chinese but trust he's a nigga. He said he would marry their if their parents would agree. He has no objection marrying a foreign and said he would prefer to marry one.
I asked friend number 3 about black women and he said I was brown not black. So then I said okay " what's your opinion about brown women. He gave some I'm running for president answer like color doesn't matter bullshit, we all are the same. But the crazy part he really believes that. I hope he never goes to America a cause he's losing his life immediatly.
My last friend said he would date a foreign girl but wouldn't marry her cause he prefers chinese and his parents wouldn't agree. He said he's intimated by them In The bedroom. Judging by his hands he should be. Again another reason why I like Chinese people is because they are very honest with themselves and other people.

Location:Jinan,China

Friends how many of us have them? NONE

God is once again taking me out my comfort zone. O wait I don't have one of those. Well my 2 besties: my roomie and G are leaving me. My roomie is a bad ass photographer and taking her talents back to America. G is my big sister from Philippines and is moving to another city in Shandong. I told God that if he sends me my soulmate then I won't complain. He has me on hold...


Pics of my last days with my besties and my Chinese New Year in Shanghai. I hate Chinese New Year because everything is closed. Another reason why Chinese people live longer, they don't play with their rest. Everything is closed including the mail. I also starved because of the restaurants were closed and the food vendors. Like really how is Lauren supposed to maintain her thickness? Ooo and the fireworks. ALL FUCKING DAY AND NIGHT! Including at 8am. Clearly I never lived in the hood cause hearing boom boom boom gets on my damn nerves. Chinese people think the more fireworks they light the prosperous they will be in that year. So all month you hear fireworks.

Location:Jinan,China

I will bring you down...... To Chinatown!!!

" I will be watching you and if I find that you are trying to corrupt my first born child, I will bring you down, baby. I will bring you down to Chinatown. " One of my favorite lines in "Meet the Parents" That is exactly how Sam's mom looked at me at dinner. Yes, I have met the parents. All my Chinese friends are so geeked and damn near planning a wedding. In China, that's the last step before getting married. I know you're thinking, I thought she was single.. I am. I'm still confused how this happen.

So I'm in the mall with hella bags. My phone rings and its Sam. ( the guy from other posts who asked about marriage) We have small talk and then he says hold on I will put you on speaker. I'm thinking he has friends over and they want to say hello. His father starts talking and Sam translates: can you come to dinner with my family tomorrow. My mind says why? I can eat at home. Unfortunately, I was raised with manners and said sure.
Next afternoon I go to Sam's house. Awkward is an understatement. Sam is from countryside so his family have never seen a black person(foreigner as what they call it, because they don't see my color just me as non Chinese). There are his father and cousins. His cousins wanted to take a picture of me, which is expected. I asked them to take a picture with me but they ran and hid like some roaches when you turn the light on. My favorite part was going in the kitchen and saying hello to his mother. She turned around not knowing I was there and just saw my face. Her facial expression really also made me fall out. PURE COMEDY!!!!
So no one in the family speaks English and I couldn't understand their Chinese. So what did I do? Smile and nod. Then I started to count things in Chinese and Spanish in my head so I wouldn't fall asleep from boredom. It felt really awkward for me. Then I thought how would it be it this was my family. The only person I would be able to talk to would be my children. I always said I hoped my future husband family doesn't speak English that way I wouldn't have to talk to them. (Don't judge me) After meeting his family, I realized that's not what I want. I want my family and his family to be one big family.
Dinner was quite a treat. Someone put a chicken's head on my plate. That's always fun. I believe his father liked me. Then most fathers love me. I spoke some Chinese he just smiled and laughed. His mother was looking at me like I was Mitt Romney. ( he's the devil here) I wanted to say " look mom, I'm not even fucking your son, relax." So I said it in my head.

After about 12 fake yawns, Sam says let me take you home I know you're tired. I did the cabbage patch in my head and said I'll get my coat. Overall, it wasn't horrible. Atleast, if they never meet another black person they have a positive opinion about us. Sometimes I forget that I'm not in America because I always think someone will be disrespectful towards me because I'm black. Although I couldn't communicate with his family they were very nice to me. Honestly in China, I haven't encountered much racism. Sam is a GREAT guy. Any girl would be lucky to have him. He has his shit together. Great job, about to buy a house, would be a great husband and father. But that's not the love of my life. I really don't think I've met the love of my life yet. I refused to settle for anything less..
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Spend New Year's Eve 2013 in South Africa!!!

Everyone talks about how they want to travel. Here's your chance.. Spend New Years 2013 in South Africa... Here's the itinerary!!!
Itinerary
Dec 26 – Travel Day (Washington D.C. – Johannesburg)
Dec 27 – Arrival Johannesburg, Welcome and Trip Briefing
Dec 28 – Soweto Tour & Apartheid Museum (lunch included) and let’s party!
Dec 29 – Safari at Pilanesburg Game Reserve (lunch included)
Dec 30 – Travel to Cape Town, dinner and let’s party!
Dec 31 – Ring in the New Year with a Champagne New Year’s Eve Cruise on the Atlantic Ocean
Jan 1 – Day at Leisure
Jan 2 – Travel Day (Cape Town – Johannesburg – Washington D.C.)
Jan 3– Arrive back in USA
Then we have payment plans! No excuses!!!!! Interested or want more info??



Here's the website:
http://www.urbanshakemagazine.com/SouthAfrica2013

Why I would suck as a wife in China

Talking to my friend has really got me thinking. If you have read my other blog this is the same guy that wants us to get married.. I guess I should give him a name. Lol. We will call him Sam. The other day we were having dinner together with his friends and his friends said that they got married first because their parents disapproved. Sam suggested that we go get married first then tell our parents. At this time I was petting his dog and when he said that I accidentally grabbed the dog which caused him to start barking. So I said hey what's wrong with the dog, should I take him for a walk?? Anything to change the subject.

Now for one we are not boyfriend and girlfriend. He says he loves me and wants to marry me. I guess a relationship first isn't necessary. Another problem I have is when people say things to me it's translated differently in my head. He said let's get married and not ask my father first. That was translated in my head as " get kicked out my daddy's will?" I'm straight. The thing about Sam he is a GREAT catch. Great job, OWNS a house and car, he will be a great provider, father and Husband etc. He's not my soulmate. I'm looking for that passionate, intense, butterflies type of love. That love that says he was created for ME! I'm only getting married one time in my life.

Another thing is that culturally we are soo different. Here are a list of reasons why I would suck as a wife here in China.


1. When you marry a Chinese person you marry the whole family. Usually, the mother in law lives with you. She cooks dinner for you everyday and takes care of the kids. Also the parents move in with you after they retire. I'm all for family! Great! I'm not trying to live with my mother in law in a 2 bedroom condo; 8 bedroom house yes. Honestly, when can I get it poppin with my husband if you in the next room cleaning? Not to mention, I barely want to see my husband everyday.

2. My baby is not wearing these slit pants. Diapers are ridiculously expensive here and you have to remember there are a billion people here. Most babies don't wear diapers but these pants and these just pee wherever. I wish I would see my husbands parents put these ugly clothes and these slit pants on my child. Meanwhile this child is prob a boy wearing a pink shirt,




3. The food I cook and the food they eat are totally different. They eat the head to fish and chicken. NO THEY DON'T EAT DOG!!!! Not even that because I'm all for cooking and cleaning. For dinner they cook like 7 things. Who can cook all of this all the time? When I'm a housewife then yes. But I plan to still have my own companies. Here's a picture of a typical Chinese dinner. Chicken, fish, tofou, potatoes, mushrooms, and greens. A regular dinner not a Sunday dinner.




4. I don't believe that a child should be in school all day. Again I have hated school since preschool (Seriously). They stay in school until 4 or 5 o'clock. When they have a holiday they go to school on a Saturday to make it up. I want my child to have a well rounded life. School is definitely important but I don't want them to be stressed about in at 10 years old. The funny thing is the kids don't seem to mind because its all they know.

5. I'm whooping my kids. Yes I'm old fashioned and believe in the power of that BELT. The kids don't receive any type of discipline until high school. If my child acts up in school I will simply walk towards him and take my hand across his face. It's soo many times I want to hit another parents child. I have snapped and disciplined my own students in front of their parents. I guess this whole I have one child and I worship them is something I don't agree with.


6. Overall I'm a handful for anyone especially for someone who comes from a completely different culture. I'm a Aries, very bold, daring, blunt etc. I have a short attention span and constantly trying find ways to spice my life up. Chinese men are more conservative. They very sheltered from the rest of the world. I want to have no limits with my husband!!!! I know I still don't want to raise my children in America but where I will live permanently I still don't know. By the end of the year, I'll be settled down then ill move wherever my husband is located.

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Location:Jinan shandong

A real business woman

I want to share everything with you just not the crazy experiences. Lol. I want everyone to feel like they are here with me or atleast have a friend in china. I am started an online boutique called Fashion Cloudz along with my bestie. Here's a preview of some of the dresses and iPhone cases. Any questions or specific orders you can hit me info@fashioncloudz.com










Not only am I'm doing an online boutique, I've also started an import/export merchant company called C'est La Vie Agency. We will start importing hair at the end of the month. We have virgin Indian remy, Brazilian, Malaysian, and Peruvian hair. For inquires please email me info@cestlavieagency.com. We can also import clothes, shoes, athletic goods, accessories , purses etc.

I believe everyone here in tone deaf...

If a Chinese person is feeling themselves you can't tell nothing!!!!
These are some kids at the Christmas party!!

Here is a student and his father singing a duet. His father is wearing high waist pants.

Am I the only one that thinks they can't sing???